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Health and safety rules to change for sausage sizzles

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health  and safety gone mad.


Bunnings' popular sausage sizzles are facing a snag - the safety dangers posed to shoppers by slippery onions.

The retail giant has confirmed new rules here and in Australia governing how sausage sizzles are to be conducted from now on.

In case you thought the operator simply slaps a sausage in a buttered piece of bread and offers you a choice of condiments think again - it turns out there is now an approved science to constructing a safe snarler.

The new rule means the fried onion can no longer be placed on top of the sausage, but now has to be on the bottom.

The new rule — which has already been rolled out in Australia — tackles the apparent dangers posed by a few bits of fried onion falling on to the ground.

"Safety is always our number one priority and we recently introduced a suggestion that onion be placed underneath sausages to help prevent the onion from falling out and creating a slipping hazard," Bunnings Australia chief operating officer Debbie Poole said.

"This recommendation is provided to the community groups within their fundraising sausage sizzle welcome pack and is on display within the gazebos when barbecues are underway," Poole said.

A Bunnings New Zealand spokesperson confirmed that the controversial change will also be applied in this country.

Like safety warnings on peanut packets advising they may contain traces of nuts or hot content cautions on coffee cups, the step has already been viewed by many as an unnecessary example of red tape.

Melbourne radio station 3AW uncovered a rumour about the new requirement this week and confirmed its existence today, sparking a mix of amusement and annoyance from listeners.

On social media, the change has prompted mostly confusion, with one blunt user summing up the mood by tweeting: "Jesus, Mary, what the f***?"‌

Bunnings doesn't believe the change will have much of an impact though.

"Regardless of how you like your [sausage sizzle], we are confident this new serving suggestion will not impact the delicious taste or great feeling you get when supporting your local community group," Poole said.

Rest assured, however, the sweet smell of the sizzle won't be leaving New Zealand anytime soon.

- Staff reporter, News.com.au

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Wow.  At least now we know the safe method of avoiding a dangerous walking and standing hazard from foods that are already probably seriously destructive to not only the human digestive track but also the circulatory system but that we all are going to eat anyway because it's just so fucking good.   I, for one, am grateful for this expenditure of financial and manpower resources to research, discuss, and legislate guidelines for the proper construction of sausage sandwiches for the purpose of us heathen hogs avoiding busting our uncoordinated asses in the food that has escaped our unrestrained and uncultured feral consumption attempts and has fallen to the ground where we, being the excessively rotund savage slobs that we are, will likely slip and fall in due to several factors, which include but are not limited to: we're so fucking fat that we can't see out feet, let alone what we might be about to walk in; all of our mental capacity is currently spent trying to shove a potentially improperly prepared sausage sandwich in our gaping maw so we are incapable of thinking that we might actually fall and hurt ourselves in our own clumsy attempts at feeding ourselves; and we are just too fucking stupid, clumsy, and sloppy that we can't be trusted not to eat without hurting ourselves.   I'm glad that there is someone out there to do the thinking for us since we aren't smart enough not to step in our own food and not hurt ourselves as a whole.  

The next piece of work from this agency won't be so heavy and depressing.  It's actually kind of an upbeat topic.  Russian Roulette for fun and profit. 

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No shit, thanks for saving me from myself.  Who knew that onions needed to shoot right to the top of the list of pressing safety concerns?  I myself have been carelessly putting onions on last over these many years carelessly endangering myself and those around me.  Just plain dangerous.

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And nobody has mentioned that all Bunnings stores are built on a highly polished concrete floor which is slippery as fuck to begin with, but let’s blame the sausage sandwich .

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